Dalam

Had a very meaningful conversation with the centre's clerk today..Let's call her kak Munirah.. Honestly I don't really communicate much with her except for when I need her to help me with making copies for the students' handouts and such..But today, (well I guessed God wants me to learn something from her - in some ways..) I've decided to stay with her for some coffee and marble cake she brought from home..

I've been teaching her daughter, Hazirah since March and I noticed her soft voice whenever she asks me questions.. Never-mind. That wasn't the point.. What I'm trying to tell you here is, I wouldn't have thought that she came from a broken family.. Shattered family, actually..

Her father left her and her mom, along with her other two siblings for a second marriage..Nope, I'm not trying to be skeptical about polygamy here nonetheless, I'm just telling you her mom's story.. okay.. Her father left her since she was inside her mom's womb..Seriously...She never knows the meaning of having a father around..and she even told me that she didn't really care about having a father at all..Since her mom is her moon and stars, y'know.. That was a very sad story indeed..

Let's get back to her mom's story now, Kak Mun, she is a Syariah Law's degree holder from UM, ironically.. She was once a teacher, teaching in government's school in Cheras..Her ex-husband asked her to quit her job because, apparently, according to him-he can provide more money that what she earns at school.. Kak Mun said, she was only 23 when she married her ex-husband and she quit teaching when she was 28.. Her ex-husband asked her to apply for some personal loan and he promised to clear the all the debts once his business gets on track..-which that, NEVER happen! Kak Mun is now being black listed from the bank where she's not eligible to apply for any loan( no car, no house, no property until she paid all her debts!) and later she was issued a letter from the bank stated that she is now in the list for bankruptcy..and that means, she can't go for haji or anywhere outside this country.. 

Unfair!

Can you imagine that? She was divorced when she was 31, a bankruptcy for her ex-husband's loan, no job with 3 little kids around..

Literally, I cried when she tells the story.. Who am I kidding? This lady before my eyes, she had suffered more than what I've been facing with my LDR with husband..That was nothing compared to her challenges in life.. I'm really ashamed of myself at this point..

From her story here, I've learnt quite a few things actually

#1: Never take for granted of anything and anyone

#2: Stay employed

#3: Save more money since we can't predict the future

Kak Mun added, 'Masa tu rasa memang sedih dan selalu tanya diri sendiri, apa salah aku sebenarnya? Kenapa macam ni balasan yang aku terima?'

and later on the counseling session she had with the counselor from JAIS, she told me that the ustaz said, 'Sering kita rasa kita dah buat banyak pahala, kita rasa kita solat, kita rasa kita mengaji, kita rasa kita dah layan suami sebaik2nya...tapi betul ke amalan kita diterima? Kita bangun solat malam x?Kita bersedekah tak? Kita berzikir tak? Jaga hubungan kita dengan Allah, Insya allah Allah akan jaga hubungan kita dengan makhluk yang lainnya'

"PANGGGG!!!!"

Yeah, that's the sound of bitch slap that I felt at that moment.. Really, God is testing us 24/7.. He tests us on things we had in our minds, the way we handle His tasks, His challenges and so on.. 

The other day, I had this conversation with Shah..We talked about the galaxy and the earth..How weird it is to live in this planet earth.. why earth? and to know that we human only discovered 9 planets in the galaxy.. or is it 8? God creates everything with purposes, right? Can't you see how small we are now? We are so busy distracting ourselves from the truth..The death..The real deal God has for us.. It's like we'll wake up tomorrow morning, have our coffee, go to work, play with our kids, laughing, watching TV and sleep...With the salary we've earned, we spend and seriously, chipping money to buy some designers' bags and what not.. Would God care about out handbags more that the rewards we earned for our loyalty to Him? I bet not.. They were all distractions.. Allahuakbar...

Man is manifestly not the measure of all things. This universe is shot through with mystery. The very fact of its being, and of our own, is a mystery absolute, and the only miracle worthy of the name. — Sam Harris

I want to make it a habit now.To share what I've read in Quran..Whatever that catches my interest..My good friend told me that I should read the Quran's translation the minute I have finished reading the verse in Arabic..So that I'm really read the Quran.. Insya Allah..What a good advice that was.. 

Well, guys..I'm sorry if this entry bores you..But I need to write it down before I forget the story lines.. =)

Really, I think that God will always directs us to the right path, just as long as we ignore those distractions in life, I think that we'll be safe on track..and He really knows what's best.. =)